I BROKE MY TOILET LAST WEEK.

when i do laundry, the washing machine inevitably goes into a spin cycle that ends up shaking the entire apartment. the whole contraption usually ends up a few centimeters away from its original location. and whatever happened to be on top of it is invariably agitated off onto the floor.

anyway, some of brooke's makeup fell behind this stupid machine.

so i set my knee down on the seat and stretched out to retrieve whatever was back there. and as i almost (and i mean almost) had my fingers around a set of nail clippers, the seat broke, leaving my knee in the toilet and my face on the top of the washer.

here's the aftermath.

i looked on the manufacturer's website for something that looked like what i had destroyed (something i never thought i would be doing). and now i think i have it narrowed down to jika lyra model #9251 or jika lukas model #9337. awesome.

i can't believe i just typed all of that.